Selfishness - Part I

Other words for selfishness: narrow-minded, egotistical, greedy, narcissistic, self-centered, mean

Selfishness defined: lacking consideration for other: concerned chiefly with one’s own personal profit or pleasure.

What are some ways we show selfishness in our everyday lives?

1.      By having a “me first” attitude:

a.      Everyday Example: Our needs and wants come before others. A selfish person would view others only as a way to get something they want. We would call this sort of person a user. They have no compassion for others. They will one up someone with a more serious story, condition, or more dramatic story. They don’t know how to listen and care for others because their focus is completely on themselves.

b.      Spiritual Life Example: Some people view prayer requests and singing opportunities as their time to talk about themselves. It’s more common when the person has missed a few services.

2.      They are manipulative:

a.      Everyday Example: Selfish people fear the possibility of losing control. They will manipulate anyone or anything to remain in control.

b.      Spiritual Life Example: Some people take on too much because they fear that someone else will outdo them. For example, a person who has done VBS for 5 consecutive years might not be willing to let someone else take control. If they do relinquish control, they give up any involvement whatsoever and have nothing to do with the activity.

3.      They are hoarders of time and things:

a.      Everyday Example: Selfish people have a hard time letting go of their time and their things. Hoarders are an example. We get selfish with our time. We find so many things that we have to get done and put our desires before everyone/everything else.

b.      Spiritual Life Example: Giving time to the church. Nothing gets accomplished if people don’t participate. We think our time is precious. Sunday mornings between 11 and 12 aren’t the only time God moves. There’s Sunday School, Sunday night, Wednesday night, camp-meetings, revival, visiting, events, and prayer meetings. It’s sad when we can’t even schedule a revival because people won’t show up. If they don’t come on regularly scheduled times, how can we expect them to come a few nights in a row? We are afraid to give up any of our TV time, our alone time and anything else that will give us satisfaction. We view church as a social event; not a life changing place to get to know one another, praise together, pray together, and worship together. We don’t view the events and extra services as opportunities to fellowship and get/give encouragement or to spread the gospel. We find them to be inconvenient and as intruders of our precious time.

4.      They are pessimistic:

a.      Everyday Example: They put the opinions of others down to make their own more impactful – especially in a group setting. They can’t handle someone else getting any glory for anything that they’re involved in.

b.      Spiritual Life Example: Many times this shows up in event planning. A group is assigned to something but one person in the group will not take in any ideas and they shoot down any that are brought up. They want all the credit for doing something.

How is selfishness described in the Bible?

1  . Paul writes to Timothy in II Timothy 3:1-5 and gives him signs to watch for. It says: “This know also, that in the last days perilous times shall come. 2 For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, 3 Without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good, 4 Traitors, heady, highminded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God; 5 Having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof: from such turn away.” He says that men will be lovers of their own selves. This is a perfect definition of selfishness. In our time today we see selfishness taking over. It’s all about greed, pride, and personal gain.

2.   In Philippians 2:21 Paul says “For all seek their own, not the things which are Jesus Christ’s”. Some will not reciprocate loving deeds because they don’t see it as gaining anything from it. If there’s no recognition for their actions, they probably won’t act.

3.   Philippians 2:4 says: “Look not every man on his own things, but every man also on the things of others.” Galatians 6:2 says “Bear ye one another's burdens, and so fulfil the law of Christ.” Paul repeats this several times in his letters. If it is repeated, he wants it to be understood. 

At the end of the lesson we discussed some history for the scripture that we'll cover next week. Our scripture will be in Luke 18:9-14. Here are some things to know before reading the parable:

a.      What is a Pharisee? A Pharisee was one of the three religious societies of Judaism during the time the New Testament was written (Sadducees and Essenes are the other two).  The Pharisees were the most vocal and influential. They focused highly on tradition and ritual. Their name in Hebrew form means “the separated ones”. They were also called “chadisim” which meant “loved by God”. This is ironic because by the time Christ arrived, the Pharisees were the most bitter, and deadly opponents of Christ and his message. They were originated with good intentions, but their selfishness got in the way. Christ gives warning to this group many times in the New Testament. Pharisees you may have heard of: Nicodemus (John 3:1), Gamaliel (Acts 5:34), and Paul (Acts 22:3).

b.    What is a Publican? A tax collector. They were contracted out in their areas by Rome. They could set their own fees and many times overcharged people when they could get by with it. The publicans were so distrusted that they were prohibited from testifying in a court of law. Banks declined their business, and even their charitable gifts generally were refused. It was deemed ethical by the Jews to resort to any sort of evasion (including outright lying) to avoid paying taxes. Rabbi’s viewed them on the same level as highwaymen and murderers. They frequently had contact with Gentiles, hence were considered unclean. Even the handle of a publican’s staff was deemed to be ceremonially contaminated. Publicans you may have heard of: Matthew and Zacchaeus.